Not Exactly a Love Story

Title: Not Exactly a Love Story

Author: Audrey Couloumbis

Publisher: Random House Books for Young Readers

Publication Date: December 11^th, 2012

Length: 288 pages

Genre: Romance

Format and Source: Hardcover, from local library.

Summary: [This will be spoiler free, but the actual review below will not]. The story is set in 1977, following a 15 year old boy called Vinnie Gold. He has a horrible case of acne, was recently left by his girlfriend and found out his parents are divorcing – so it’s safe to say his life is pretty shitty at best. Very soon, his mother falls in love with Vinnie’s gym teacher – Mr. B., and the trio move to Long Island. While he’s incredibly upset, Vinnie finds a distraction from his problems – his super hot, super popular neighbour – Patsy. As expected, Patsy doesn’t speak to the uncool Vinnie, but when by chance he comes across her number, things change. It starts with a phone call, and an accidental inappropriate comment. “Wanna fuck?”

‘Not Exactly a Love Story’ follows the development of Patsy’s relationship with her mystery obscene caller, and Vinnie’s struggle to separate his two (polar opposite) identities.

Review: [Reminder: Spoilers]. This was an extremely well written novel. It was written quite recently, but Couloumbis manages to display the olden vibes more than adequately. It was a great way to pass a weekend, and provides light reading enjoyable by anyone.

Vinnie Gold is an average guy, but he’s put through some pretty tough circumstances. He has a horrible case of acne, his parents are divorcing, and he’s super unsporty – despite his stepdad being his gym teacher. He also, apparently, doesn’t know how to communicate with girls – even though he had a girlfriend previously? When he calls his neighbour, Patsy, he doesn’t say anything the first two times, and when he finally picks up the nerve to speak, he lets slip a rude comment! I just didn’t find this believable at all. If his relationship with his ex was as good as it was made out to be, I doubt he would be this shy. But this didn’t take away from the greatness of the book.

Something that did however irritate me while I read this novel was that Vinnie’s life seems to revolve around Patsy, cooking and running. While I understand that the plot needs to keep moving along, it’s very rushed regarding school and the like. It’s almost as if Couloumbis, in a state of laziness, wrote ‘Vinnie went to school. He stared at Patsy from afar as he ran along the track field. He hoped she didn’t know he was the mystery called. He went home.’ This was the only major problem I had with this book – I felt as though if more attention was paid to detail (without overdoing it), it would have been so much more realistic.

For me, the most enjoyable part of reading this book was Patsy’s character. She’s feisty, flirty, pretty, popular, kind – basically all the things a girl wishes she can be, without seeming too perfect to be real. Her reactions were very natural, and she was probably the most well-rounded character in the story. Patsy was – as you would expect – genuinely pissed off at her mystery caller at first, but as time passed, she got to know him well – and really started falling for him. At the same time, Vinnie was talking to her in real life, but she found a common issue in ‘both’ of them. They were too cool and never shared their feelings. This was one of the reasons that Patsy rejected Vinnie Gold.

I commend Couloumbis for using clichés, but also twisting them around and making them her own. While themes such as jerk jocks, and the popularity scale were seen throughout the book, the prom scene was brilliantly pulled off. You’d except that if the mystery boy agrees to meet the girl on the night of prom, he’d be revealed by some accident – but this was totally not the case, and Couloumbis totally won me over with this.

While she could have dealt with some issues more carefully, this book was so well-written that it would be a crime not to recommend it. It’s a brilliant coming-of-age story, and will have you laughing and crying with the characters. Despite the out-of-the-ordinary conditions that bring Vinnie and Patsy together, their interactions seems so human, it’s impossible not to fall in love with them.

My Final Rating: B+. This story would have gotten an A if it weren’t for the disregard to Vinnie’s average life (that didn’t always revolve around Patsy) – but don’t let that stop you from reading this book. It’s written so well that you can’t help but love it – and personally, it’s now sitting in my Amazon cart, waiting for me to ship over another fairly large amount of books at Christmas.

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